Tuesday, April 29, 2008


Yes, NOW. Is that the best you can do? Talk about slouchy. We here at the Board of Revision would like to question your academic itinerary. We have been informed about your own personal style of revision. You have an exam on Friday and your revision is paltry at best. Flicking aimlessly through a textbook, muttering about paying £3000 to be miserable and selecting your favourite coloured gel pens is NOT revision. You are supposed to be in a quiet room sipping herbal tea, with natural light and classical music. NOT perched on your bed, refreshing the Boosh forum every two minutes, knocking back Diet Coke and playing Annie really loud.

Revision is a STATE OF MIND. It should follow a strict schedule, begin with a hearty meal and should conclude in a woodland ramble and a jolly pat on the back. It should be following the examination guidelines and simply going back over what you already learnt. Unfortunately it seems that for this module you laughed at Ian McKellen's 'Mental Macbeth face' and gave Cassio 'marks out of 10, for goodlookingness'.

This is unacceptable. We SAW you today throw that textbook on the floor. It does NOT belong on the floor, you should be discussing contextual race issues not giggling over LOLBoosh. You are 20 years old now, and you moan like a 15yr old studying for their french oral. What? That joke is disgraceful and unfunny. To laugh at that was immature.

Quiet in the back,

Board of Revision.

PS. Revision does not work by Osmosis, sitting with Leavis on your lap as you watch Project Runway is not proper revision. And your Tim Gunn needs improvement by the way, its 'carrry onnn...make it workkkk' not 'carrrryyy onnn' make it worrrrkk'. Loser.

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